ARIZONA
"On July 4, 1888, Juan Leivas roped and tied a steer at Prescott in America’s first rodeo. With a mortgage like ours we know how the steer felt". 
CALIFORNIA
"In 1849 the famous "Gold Rush" changed California forever. Prospectors known as 49ers poured into the territory. Today If you dig straight down at this Location don’t hit the septic tank".
COLORADO"In 1858 "Pikes Peak or Bust," was the cry as miners poured into the territory to seek their fortune. We tried that here and the neighbors complained about the noise".
DELAWARE
"On December 7, 1787 Delaware ratified the Constitution and became the first state admitted to the union. If this building had been here, someone would have thrown a party".
FLORIDA
"On March 3, 1845, Florida became the 27th state. The Seven Year War with the Seminole Indians had ended. Visitors arrived by railroads and steamships, and this building was not yet here".
GEORGIA
"In 1864, General W. T. Sherman burned Atlanta and began his march to the sea. Cotton was king, "Gone With the Wind" was Georgia, and this ain’t Tare".
IDAHO
"In 1860, prospectors stampeded into Idaho with the discovery of gold on Orofino Creek. To this date not a single gold nugget has been found at this site".
ILLINOIS
"In 1858, the Lincoln-Douglas debates identified how the issue of slavery was dividing the nation. Had they made their train connection in Chicago both would have had lunch here".
IOWA
"In the 1880s Iowa’s farmers began raising hogs on home grown corn, forever changing the state’s economy. So while eating here, please don’t make a pig of yourself".
KANSAS
"In the 1860’s Bat Masterson and Wyatt Earp cleaned up the lawlessness in Dodge City and Abilene. Here you are more than welcome to clean up the kitchen".
KENTUCKY
"In 1875, the first Kentucky Derby was run at Louisville, beginning a great tradition in American sports. At this "Old Kentucky Home" horses must wipe their feet before entering".
LOUISIANA
"In 1803 Napoleon sold the entire Louisiana Territory far $15 million to the United States. That was a much better deal than we got on this property".
MAINE
"In 1770, Burnham Tavern in Machias opened, offering, "Drink for the thirsty, food for the hungry, lodging for the weary, and good keeping for horses." That offer still applies here".
MASSACHUSETTS
"On April 18, 1775 Paul Revere made his famous ride to warn his fellow patriots that the British were coning. Unlike here, we have no warning when visitors are coming".
MINNESOTA
"In 1889, the Mayo Clinic, one of the world’s leading medical centers, was established in Minnesota. If this building had been here, they still would not have made a house call".
MISSISSIPPI
"In 1894, in Vicksburg, Joseph Biedenharn, a candy store owner, first bottled Coca-Cola. If we had been here than we could have bought a six-pack".
MISSOURI
"In 1865, the notorious bandit, Jesse James began to terrorize this state. He never tried to rob the people in this building because it was not".
NEBRASKA
"In 1883, Buffalo Bill’s famous Wild West Show was organized at his ranch in North Platte, and this is definitely not a home where the buffalo roam".
NEVADA"In 1859, silver miners rushed into Nevada after hearing of the incredibly rich Comstock lode. You are standing at the very location where nothing was found".
NEW HAMPSHIRE
"In 1777, hundreds of New Hampshire "Minutemen" hurried to Boston to fight the British. Here no one has been in a hurry since".
NEW JERSEY
"3000 visitors came to Menlo Park in 1879 to witness Thomas Edison’s demonstration of the electric light. Today, we would be happy with one visitor who could change a light bulb".
NEW MEXICO
"The Santa Fe Trail was established in 1821, opening a new trade route to New Mexico. Nowadays, we would be satisfied with a new route to the grocery store".
NEW YORK
"In 1626, Peter Minuit purchased Manhattan Island for roughly $24 in trinkets. That was a much better deal than we got on this property".
NORTH CAROLINA
"On January 7, 1838, Silver Hill Mine opened near Lexington, becoming the first silver mine in the United States. None of the proceeds were used to purchase this property".
OHIO
"In 1869, the first public weather forecasting service began in Cincinnati. When we watch the weather on TV here, the forecasting is no better than it was then".
OKLAHOMA
"On April 22, 1889, nearly 50,000 settlers poured into Oklahoma as the territory was opened to homesteaders. If this house had been built "Sooner" one might have settled here".
SOUTH CAROLINA
"On April 12, 1861, Confederate Army batteries shelled Fort Sumter In Charleston Harbor, beginning the Civil War. And this building was not here yet".
TENNESSEE
"In the Mexican War 1845, citizens volunteered in such numbers that Tennessee is known as the volunteer state. Here we can’t get a volunteer to take out the garbage".
TEXAS V1
"On April 21, 1836, Texas troops under Sam Houston won independence, as they shouted out "Remember the Alamo." When we tried that here the neighbors complained about the noise".
TEXAS V2
"On March 2, 1836 Texas declared her independence from Mexico. Wild Comanches roomed the plains, rangers protected frontier settlements, and this building was not here yet".
UTAH
"On May 10 1869, east met west as the last spike was driven, completing the Union Pacific Railroad. Many years later, the last nail was driven, completing this building".
VERMONT
"On March 4, 1791, after the American Revolution, Vermont became our 14th state. Pioneers on small farms began producing maple syrup and dairy products, and this building was not here yet".
VIRGINIA
"Virginia, 1st of the 13 original colonies contributed such dedicated statesmen as Patrick Henry, George Washington, and Thomas Jefferson to the course of freedom. None of which slept here".
WEST VIRGINIA
"In 1859, the famous abolitionist, John Brown and his followers raided the arsenal at Harper’s Ferry. Here, we like to raid the refrigerator".
